Chapter 21: Dating Touya-kun, and Then… (Eri, Vocational School)
Dating Touya-kun, and Then… (Eri, Vocational School)
When Shuu’s name came up, my body froze for a moment as if paralyzed.
…Somewhere in my heart, did I think “Now I have an excuse to see Shuu again”?
At the same time, the thought “I’m Touya-kun’s girlfriend right now, you know?” struck me, and I think that’s why I couldn’t speak.
Of course, I also wanted to celebrate for Kohaku-san.
But I felt like if I saw Shuu, the relationship I had built with Touya-kun might fall apart…
“Sorry… can you give me some time to think about it?”
[…Yeah, I understand. There’s still time, so take it easy and think it over, okay?]
“Thank you…”
[But, Eri-chan…]
“What?”
[Make sure you don’t have any regrets… alright?]
…
Regrets… What should I do… what am I supposed to do…
My heart, which should have been calm and content, felt like it had been thrown into chaos.
I don’t know what I want to do…
No… I don’t want to think about it…
The answer is…
I want to see Touya-kun…
“Hello?… Touya-kun, can we meet now?”
Was it because I wanted reassurance, or because I was trying to run away…
He seemed a little surprised by my call, but maybe he sensed something was wrong with me, because Touya-kun came right away.
Then, to calm my restless heart, I went on a date with Touya-kun and had a meal together.
“You called me so suddenly, did something happen?”
“No… I just suddenly wanted to see you so badly, Touya-kun… ehehe.”
Seeing Touya-kun made my heart feel fulfilled…
And after we finished eating, as we strolled around,
“I was really surprised when you suddenly said you wanted to see me.”
“Ehehe, did you not like it?”
“It’s not that, but… ah! That’s right, Christmas is coming soon, right? …so I thought I’d prepare a present, but…”
As he said that, Touya-kun reached out as if to touch the pendant hanging from my neck.
“Not this one, but how about we go look for a new one? I was going to surprise you with a gift, but I thought it’d be better if we chose something together that you’d like so much you’d want to wear it every day, Eri.”
…
…The pendant.
“Shuu, this round blue gemstone… I like it.”
“This one’s good. Yeah, why don’t we pick this?”
“Yeah, I don’t think there’s anything better than this one either.”
“It’s kind of strange, but it’s beautiful like Eri’s eyes…”
…
“…Stop it!!”
“Eri!? …S-Sorry.”
“…Touya-kun, I’m sorry, I… I’m going home.”
“Eri!!”
I found myself thinking I didn’t want him to touch it.
I found myself thinking I didn’t want to take it off.
And then… I realized I still wanted to see Shuu…
I’m such a terrible woman…
Even though I felt fulfilled being with Touya-kun, deep down I still hadn’t let go of Shuu.
I do like Touya-kun… but I can’t forget.
“Make sure you don’t have any regrets… alright?”
And from that date on, with the stress of job hunting piling up, things between me and Touya-kun grew a little strained. By the time winter break of my second year came around…
“I… I’m going back home this year… I’ve got the coming-of-age ceremony too.”
“I see… take care.”
I turned down the plan to spend Christmas together, and went home as if running away.
There was still time before the coming-of-age ceremony. Since it had been about a year and a half since I was last in my hometown, and because I wanted to be reunited with my mother, I went back as soon as winter break began…
“You’ve been staying home all the time…”
“Eh? Do you not want me around?”
“…No, it’s not that.”
I had a vague idea of what my mother meant.
“Aren’t you going to see Shuu-kun?” she was thinking.
I had told her I broke up with Shuu… but I couldn’t bring myself to tell her about Touya-kun.
Why is that… even though I like him… Looking back now, I think it was because once I said it out loud, there would be no turning back.
Even though I wanted to, I couldn’t bring myself to say it. Seeing me like that, my mother probably misunderstood.
Around that time, Kohaku-san and Yae-chan, who I had told I was coming home, invited me to hang out.
Kohaku-san came to pick me up by car, with Yae-chan already sitting in the passenger seat.
“Eri-chan, long time no see! …You’ve gotten so pretty.”
“It’s been a while! Really?”
“…Eri-chan, you look so mature… Did Tokyo rub off on you?”
“Hey! What do you mean ‘rub off’? Ehehe.”
Meeting those two, who I could truly call close friends, for the first time in a while made the haze in my heart feel a little lighter.
Back in high school, we even went on triple dates together… those were fun times.
“Alright, today’s drive is for a change of pace!”
“…Yeah!”
“Ehehe, thank you, both of you.”
Inside the heated car, I looked out at the thin layer of snow piled up, and I felt once again that I was really back home.
While driving, we got excited chatting. Kohaku-san bragged about her boyfriend, and Yae-chan, though still quiet as ever, would suddenly say something funny.
Both of them created such a comfortable mood that I finally decided to open up.
“The truth is… while I was in Tokyo, I got a boyfriend.”
“Well, I kinda figured as much.”
“…Me too, I thought your vibe felt a little different.”
Ahaha… so they noticed after all.
“You were single, so it’s not like it’s a bad thing, right?”
“…That’s right, love is free.”
“Ehehe, thanks.”
“But, Eri-chan, are you… happy now?”
Happy… I think so.
Until recently I was sure of it, but now I couldn’t answer right away.
“…Eri-chan, you’ve been hung up on it the whole time, haven’t you?”
“…Just like a certain someone.”
“…Eh?”
“Yae-chan and I said we wouldn’t butt in since it was something you and Shou-chan decided for yourselves, but…”
“…We said the same thing with Shou-chan and the others too.”
“But… neither Kuroda-kun nor you, Eri-chan, seemed like you could handle it, so just out of a little meddling, we asked you to come back… Sorry for being selfish.”
“…Kuroda-kun still wears that too, you know.”
As she said that, Yae-chan turned from the passenger seat to look at me in the back and pointed at the pendant on my neck.
…What? Shuu is still… wearing the matching pendant?
…At that moment, the lid I thought had sealed my heart shifted, and something began to spill out.
…Why?
Didn’t he hurt me… didn’t he get tired of me… wasn’t it him who brought up the breakup?
…Shuu, why?
“That’s why… to move forward, you should meet and talk with him once. Leaving it half-finished is unfair, to Kuroda-kun, to your boyfriend in Tokyo, and to you too, Eri-chan.”
“…Yeah, maybe it’s better to talk it out before deciding the next step.”
…Shuu.
“It’s been almost two years since you broke up, right? You’ve both grown a little since then, so unlike before, I think you could talk calmly now. This is the perfect chance.”
“…Grown up, pfft… Kuroda-kun’s hairstyle and color… pfft!”
“Hey! Yae-chan, don’t laugh! He said ‘I thought I’d try changing my look’ and dyed his hair blonde, you know, Kuroda-kun.”
Shuu with blonde hair… he already had a bit of a scary face and a big build, so that would make him look even scarier…
“…Shou-chan, you laugh every time you see Kuroda-kun, don’t you?”
“That’s why when he tried to stop dyeing it, it ended up all patchy, which made it even funnier… fufu!”
I wonder how he’s changed since then, I want to see for myself…
“That’s why you should meet him directly.”
…And at that moment, I made up my mind to try seeing Shuu again.