Chapter 236: Ai's True Feelings

Ai’s True Feelings

Ichijo Ai’s Perspective

Senpai dives deep into the world of creation.

I can only watch from behind. But once he starts working, his focus is so intense it almost worries me as he types away at his keyboard.

I’ve heard that many people write on their smartphones, but Senpai seems to prefer using a computer.

We made a promise—I would be the first to read his finished novel. No matter how curious I get, I must not disturb him.

I decide to wait in the guest room. Ever since that day, I’ve been spending most of my time at his house. Even his mother told me, “Until you feel settled, don’t be alone. Stay here and eat with us for now.” They were all worried about me.

Since Senpai is busy, I borrow the desk in the guest room to pass the time with my schoolwork. I heard this room used to belong to his father. The bookshelf, lined with professional cookbooks and old notebooks, feels almost sacred—like a sanctuary within this home.

“It’s strange… I’m alone in someone else’s house, and yet, I feel at peace.”

Not long ago, seeing my father again after so many years had thrown my heart into turmoil. But now, thanks to Senpai and his family’s kindness, I feel calm.

“Ah… I’m out of lead for my mechanical pencil.”

I don’t have any refills left either. Senpai’s mother had mentioned that there were supplies in the desk drawer and that I could use them freely, so I decided to take her up on the offer.

When I open the drawer, I find an assortment of stationery inside. She must have prepared them for me. Living alone for so long has made me vulnerable to this kind of warmth—to the kindness of a family.

My chest tightens, and I quickly press a handkerchief to my eyes before the tears can fall.

Taking a deep breath, I steady myself.

As I reach for the lead, my fingers brush against something at the back of the drawer.

It’s smooth to the touch. Curious, I pull it out—it’s an old photograph. Laminated, probably to keep it from deteriorating. It must have been important to someone.

The picture captures my father, smiling alongside two other men.

To my father’s left stands Mayor Minami. To his right is likely the former owner of this room.

He looks… somewhat like Senpai. Is this what Senpai will look like when he’s older?

This photo was probably taken around ten years ago. My father looks like he was in his thirties at the time. I wonder—ten or more years from now, in the future... will I have become a kind and wonderful woman, like my mother, standing by his side?

“I can see it so clearly… a future where I’m still with him, even ten years from now.”

That’s probably the biggest change in me since meeting him. The incident with my mother had made me painfully aware that the future is unpredictable.

Before I met him, the word tomorrow only brought me suffering.

But now…

“Thinking about the future… about tomorrow… fills me with happiness. I really have changed.”

And because I’ve changed, I finally feel ready to say it. The words I had swallowed down for so long, believing they would only bring pain if spoken. I used to think that putting them into words would only make things harder. That saying them out loud would make it hurt even more.

But now, I know that’s not true. Maybe meeting him made me weaker. That thought used to scare me.

But now, I understand—I’ve actually become stronger.

That’s why I can finally say it.

“I want to see my father’s smile again.”

I couldn’t hold it in. Pressing my handkerchief firmly to my eyes to keep the tears from staining the photo, I sobbed in silence.

At last, I said it. For so long, all I could do was apologize… but finally…